Keep Your Germs To Yourself

Today I am in a prayerful state of mind. There are many things that land on top of my prayer list, some huge and profound, and many rather trivial things. But today I have a prayer request, and it's a doozy. My two year old daughter has a stomach bug, and my prayer is as follows: 1) that I won't catch it and 2) that my older kids won't catch it. I mean, really, what mother of three small children who also barrel races and runs a spa on the side has time to be sick? I know I don't. And now I'm going to share some totally disgusting, only a mother could understand details with the world. I know this particular stomach bug WELL. I can identify the little monster solely on the way the poop smells. My older kids have had it more than once. There is nothing like unloading your kid for school and having her announce to the teacher opening the door that she had to stay home yesterday because she had diarrhea. Talk about a proud parenting moment. This condition brings with it a little fever and a lot of poop. Mercifully, my children usually have it one at a time, but dealing with it really makes for a shitty day (pun intended.)
 I have often marveled at how much of motherhood revolves around bodily functions. Mothers are chewed on, peed on, pooped on, sneezed on, snotted on, puked on, the list could go on and on. And for you moms-to-be, anyone that tells you that diaper changing is less disgusting when it's your child is full of, well, poop. There is nothing nice about a dirty diaper, and I don't care whose kid the stuff inside came out of. As a mom, you will continually be amazed at what you are willing to do for these tiny, helpless creatures that you gave birth to. Then as they get older, you will still be amazed at what you are willing to do for the ungrateful little monsters. (Just kidding on that one. Sort of.) Potty training and vomit in the bed are my least favorite parts of parenthood, at least the first six years of it. Yes, yes, I know...mothers of teenagers swear to me that it gets worse later. They assure me that I will long for these days when my girls are running out the door with their cell phones hermetically sealed to their ears. But for the moment, I am stuck in bodily-functionville and am quite ready to see the other side.
So this is me, asking God for health and wellness in my home. And to my dear, dear children who I love so very much, please keep your germs to yourself. That is all.