Goodbye, Zoey.

It is with a very heavy heart that I share the loss of our English bulldog, Zoey. It has taken me a long time to get to this post, I suppose because it makes me so sad. I miss her snoring at night, I miss her sitting at my feet while I put on makeup, I miss the sound of her toenails on the floor as she followed me around the house. I even miss her stinky breath, and let me tell you, it was bad!
When my normally tough as nails husband called and told me he was bringing an old, sad bulldog home because he just couldn't put her to sleep, I had no idea that she would end up being mine. I remember the first time I saw her, sitting there in the back seat of his truck. She was old, she was sick, and she was skinny. Her nose was running, her eye was cloudy, and she weighed approximately half as much as she should have. Over the next few months, she slowly gained weight. Her eye cleared up, we had her spayed and her teeth cleaned, and trimmed those long toenails as best we could. She also wormed her way into my heart and our bedroom.
This post will be short, as I don't have the time to do her justice. I am thinking really hard about starting another book with her as the subject. She taught our family so much about love and loss. It broke my heart to think that someone bred her as many times as they could, sold her puppies for a profit, and then threw her away when she was no longer "useful." I hope the karma bus runs them over.
When I sat with her for the last time, stroking her head and looking into those sad eyes, all I could do was try to reassure her that she was loved in this lifetime, that for a little while she was part of a family who cared what happened to her. We cared if she was sick, or hungry, or had a soft place to sleep. She gave us unconditional love in return. We love you, sweet Zoey. I hope you are in a happier place. We left your MSU collar on so that the girls would recognize you when we get to where you are. Rest in peace, sweet girl. I miss you every day.